Cheers and Jeers: Rum and Coke FRIDAY!

[Brexiter]

This Wayback Machine Only Goes to '10

While the studios continue dragging their feet during the writers' strike in the hopes that they'll soon be able to give all the jobs to the robots, C&J dips its ladle into the comedy cauldron of yesteryear. Let's go back a baker's dozen years and see what the late-night bunch was saying about this ‘n that during the dog days of August 2010…

"Everyone is talking about Steven Slater, the flight attendant who cursed at a passenger, grabbed two beers, and slid down the escape slide, which may be the best resignation ever. In fact he’s so good at quitting, they’re thinking about making him the next governor of Alaska." —Jimmy Kimmel

"Look at Newt Gingrich. His moral compass is so great he can make it point wherever he wants, at least according to his ex-wife, Marianne in this month's Esquire. Now don’t worry, this isn't that depressing story about Newt dumping his wife when she was in the hospital with cancer—Marianne's the woman he dumped the cancer wife for. You see, later Newt left Marianne for an even younger congressional aide, who became his third wife.

Newt is so pro-marriage he can't stop doing it! And he's so morally upright that he's only had sex after he was married...just not always to the woman he was married to." —Stephen Colbert

Continued…

You are now below the fold. Your trial date is May 14, 2035.​

"A federal judge in California struck down Proposition 8, saying it was unconstitutional. Remember when women used to say the best ones were either gay or married? Now they can be both." —Jay Leno

"Y'know, maybe this rally, 47 years to the day where Martin Luther King held his rally, is appropriate. Because Glenn Beck does have a dream. Unfortunately it's the kind of dream you have when you eat four pepperoni Hot Pockets right before bed." —Jon Stewart, referring to Beck's D.C. event as his "I have a scheme" speech

August 2010: President Obama puts his toe on the scale as Trip Director Marvin Nicholson tries to weigh himself during a hold in the volleyball locker room at the University of Texas in Austin.

"A company in Britain has created a car that can be powered by human waste. It's cool, but it gets a little uncomfortable when your buddy asks you to 'chip in' for gas." —Jimmy Fallon

"Schwarzenegger was only in the [new Sylvester Stallone] movie for five minutes, but during that five minutes he achieved more than in all his years as governor. ... When he heard the title—The Expendables—he thought it was in reference to California's teachers." —Craig Ferguson

"Can you imagine Rod Blagojevich in a prison jumpsuit? He'd look like a traffic cone with a Koosh ball on top." —Jimmy Kimmel

And now, our feature presentation...

-​

Cheers and Jeers for Friday, August 11, 2023

Note: Due to a clerical error, you owe me $15,297.54. But we'll settle for half and never speak of it again. (Cash only. No CODs or Bitcoin, please.)

-

By the Numbers:

7 days!!!

Weeks 'til the start of the Labor Day weekend: 3

Days 'til the Alaska State Fair in Palmer: 7

Drop in China's consumer price index, slipping into deflation for the first time in two years: -0.3%

Points by which the "No" vote beat the "Yes" vote in Ohio's special election Tuesday, a margin not seen since King James III beat Pope Boniface VIII 110-6 in Pickleball: 14

Amount that Maine projects would receive in fiscal 2024 under appropriation bills endorsed by the Senate, up $278 million from a year ago: $602 million

National rank of Maine among top recipients of earmarks in the Senate: #1

Rank of Canada among the world's macaroni & cheese consumers: #1

-

Puppy Pic of the Day: Weekend plans…

-

CHEERS to taming the beast. July's inflation numbers were released today, and the monthly increase is still around three percent. If you listen to the economic pessimists, who have been wrong about almost everything, ZOMG INFLATION WON’T COME DOWN FOR A THOUSAND YEARS!!! But there are seemingly level heads out there who believe things could be getting better—perhaps much better—soon:

Housing makes up the largest chunk of CPI, and that measurement—known as shelter inflation—is expected to cool this year and might even go negative next year, according to the researchers. … [F]orecasts from the San Francisco Fed researchers suggest we could see the most severe contraction in shelter inflation since the Global Financial Crisis of 2007 to 2009, they say.

Lots of number-crunching out there, but this was another very good inflation report. The debate over whether disinflation requires a large bulge in unemployment is essentially over. No, it doesn't. But there's still a debate about how we did this, which matters 1/

— Paul Krugman (@paulkrugman) August 10, 2023

-​

“Our baseline forecast suggests that year-over-year shelter inflation will continue to slow through late 2024 and may even turn negative by mid-2024,” the researchers wrote. “This would represent a sharp turnaround in shelter inflation, with important implications for the behavior of overall inflation.”

Not to mention implications for the 2024 elections. Not that we would ever cynically inject politics into the economy. [Adjusts halo.] Oh no. How dare you suggest such a thing.

JEERS to Justice Funinthesun. Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas got busted again by Pro Publica for failing to disclose that he's a massive hedonist willing to say and do anything on behalf of white billionaires as long as they dangle big enough yachts and private jets in front of him. What a waste of active biological tissue:

During his three decades on the Supreme Court, Clarence Thomas has enjoyed steady access to a lifestyle most Americans can only imagine. A cadre of industry titans and ultrawealthy executives have treated him to far-flung vacations aboard their yachts, ushered him into the premium suites at sporting events and sent their private jets to fetch him—including, on more than one occasion, an entire 737.

“I prefer the RV parks. I prefer the Walmart parking lots to the beaches and things like that. There's something normal to me about it. I come from regular stock, and I prefer being around that.” —Clarence Thomas

It’s a stream of luxury that is both more extensive and from a wider circle than has been previously understood. [...]

Thomas appears to have violated the law by failing to disclose flights, yacht cruises and expensive sports tickets, according to ethics experts.

Perhaps even more significant, the pattern exposes consistent violations of judicial norms, experts, including seven current and former federal judges appointed by both parties, told ProPublica. “In my career I don’t remember ever seeing this degree of largesse given to anybody,” said Jeremy Fogel, a former federal judge who served for years on the judicial committee that reviews judges’ financial disclosures.

When asked how this kind of malfeasance could've happened when he's supposed to be a pillar of honesty and integrity, Thomas responded: "I accidentally tripped and fell into all those planes and yachts and deluxe suites and piles of Nazi linen napkins. Clumsy me, huh." Well, when you put it like that, sir. Sorry to have bothered you.

JEERS to opening big mouth before engaging small brain. On August 11, 1984, during a radio voice test, President Reagan joked (and this joke became the spark for Presidential Joke Day, which is today): "My fellow Americans, I'm pleased to tell you today that I've signed legislation that would outlaw Russia forever. We begin bombing in five minutes." (Listen to it here.) The Russians had a good laugh over it...right after they carefully put their missiles back in their silos and sucked down a bottle of vodka. Not necessarily in that order.

-

BRIEF SANITY BREAK

-​

This is a natural drum machine of 17 drums representing different cultures. The copper pipes have release valves triggered by a midi signal creating programmed rhythms of contemporary and ethnic compositions [ Patrick Benson: https://t.co/NpkvETe8GK]pic.twitter.com/F0SiPe5C0h

— Massimo (@Rainmaker1973) August 9, 2023

-

END BRIEF SANITY BREAK

-​

CHEERS to cleaning up after "The war to end all wars." On August 11, 1919, Germany’s Weimar Constitution came into being. It was quite liberal for its time, bestowing more rights than we currently have in this country:

» A German's home is an asylum and is inviolable.

Every German was guaranteed strudel on Sunday, until sourpuss Hitler changed it to cabbage pulp.

» Persons have the right to be notified within a day of their arrest or detention as to the authority and reasons for their detention and be given the opportunity to object. This is equivalent to the principle of habeas corpus in the common law of England and elsewhere.

» Privacy of correspondence, of mail, telegraph, and telephone are inviolable.

» Germans are entitled to free expression of opinion in word, writing, print, image, etc. This right cannot be obstructed by job contract, nor can exercise of this right create a disadvantage. Censorship is prohibited.

And then Hitler came along and fucked it all up, upon which America's Republican party shouted, "Cut us a slice 'o that!" So Adolf's roadmap became the MAGA roadmap, and here we are. Anyway, it was signed 104 years ago today by President Friedrich Ebert after giving it...two thumbs up.

CHEERS to home vegetation. No hard evidence to go on here, but it seems like this weekend—smack dab in the middle of August—is poised to be the dog-days'iest of summer. If the teevee beckons, it'll be offering pretty slim pickin's. So here it is in a nutshell:

Note: this will be thrown up on all of your screens for several hours this weekend so that all the world’s devices can be color-balanced.

Chris Hayes and the MSNBC crew start things off tonight with the Friday news dumps, including the latest on Trump’s legal hell. And we’ll be live-tweeting tonight’s Star Trek episode Mark of Gideon (H&I Network, 8pm) via hashtag #allstartrek. The most popular movies and streaming options, new and old, are all reviewed here at Rotten Tomatoes. (The third season of Only Murders in the Building is streaming on Hulu.) The baseball schedule is here and the WNBA schedule is here. On a new edition of 60 Minutes: a profile of photographer James Nachtwey, and a nonprofit’s effort to create the largest nature preserve in the Lower 48.

Now here's your Sunday morning lineup:

Meet the Press: Rep. Dean Phillips (D-MN); Legal eagle Chuck Rosenberg; Presidential candidate Mike Pence (MAGA-IN).

Sunday on “Face the Platypus”: pointers on politics, the pandemic, and Planned Parenthood with a polished panel of political platypundits.

This Week: Kickass Congressman Jamie Raskin (D-MD); Presidential candidate Chris Christie (MAGA-NJ); Chief Operating Officer in the Office of the Georgia Secretary of State Gabriel Sterling; Former U.S. Attorney in the Southern District of New York Preet Bharara.

Face the Nation: Reps. Jill Tokuda (D-HI) and Mike Turner (MAGA-OH); University of Chicago Prof. Robert Pape on the state of MAGA extremism in America.

CNN’s State of the Union: Kickass Congressman Dan Goldman (D-NY); Kickass Senator Mazie Hirono (D-HI); MAGA presidential candidate and former Rep. Will Hurd (TX).

Fox MAGA Talking Points: Reps. Michael McCaul (MAGA-TX) and Adam Smith (D-WA).

Happy viewing!

-

Ten years ago in C&J: August 11, 2013

CHEERS to shrinkage. Here's a preview of coming attractions that the right-wingers aren't gonna like one bit: their favorite Big Bad Boogeyman known as "the deficit" is shrinking by leaps and bounds:

The 2013 budget year ending Sept. 30 will be the first one of Obama's presidency in which the deficit won't exceed $1 trillion. Obama inherited a struggling economy and record deficits. A 2011 deficit-cutting deal with Republicans has pared deficits somewhat, as did a tax hike enacted earlier this year on upper-bracket earners. […]

Last year's deficit registered about $1.1 trillion. … As a percentage of the economy, the new deficit would be half the size of what it was when Obama entered office.

The numbers would be much better if the stupid sequester wasn't in place. Unfortunately, the intellectual deficit among the majority in the House of Representatives is still at eleventy gazillion brain cells. Plus infinity.

-

And just one more…

CHEERS to cleansing your cosmic soul. Heads-up, everyone: the Perseid meteor shower is putting on a display of late-night/early-morning Perseidiousness this weekend. Unlike last year, this time around you might get treated to some nocturnal razzle-dazzle:

This year the shower will peak around the night of Aug. 12 and before dawn on Aug.13, 2023, according to the science site Royal Museums Greenwich.

The Perseids are caused by Earth passing through debris—bits of ice and rock—left behind by Comet Swift-Tuttle which last passed close to Earth in 1992. The Perseids peak when Earth passes through the densest and dustiest area on Aug. 11-12.

What the….???

In 2022, the Perseids were affected by the full moon illuminating the sky and washing out fainter meteors. However, this year the moon will provide minimal disturbance to the meteor shower as it will only be 10% illuminated during the time of the peak.

Everyone agrees that meteor showers are beautiful, unite Americans in a common activity, and make lots of people happy and curious about the universe and the wonders of science. And in other news, to prevent the spread of socialism, Republicans announced this morning that they plan to introduce a constitutional amendment banning all future meteor showers.

Have a great weekend. Floor's open...What are you cheering and jeering about today?

-