A Fine Quartet Turns 82
A portrait in contrast to the ideology Republicans tried to force on our country two years ago tomorrow: it was on January 6, 1941 when Franklin Roosevelt delivered his famous "Four Freedoms" State of the Union speech. (You can read it and hear it here). While the oft-cited quartet—of speech, of religion, from want and from fear—is timeless, so too is this part of his address, which basically is both the Democratic playbook and the American dream. Here's what the dirty effing Hyde Park hippie bleated:
Continued...
He was right—simple and basic things based on decency, compassion and common sense to ensure domestic tranquility and promote the public good. What a perfect contrast to the “ideals” of anarchy and dictatorship that’ll be celebrated tomorrow by Republicans on their new high holy day. I’ll take FDR’s vision, thanks. I just never quite got the hang of knuckle dragging.
And now, our feature presentation…
Cheers and Jeers for Thursday, January 5, 2023
Note: Today is National Bird Day. Please flip it responsibly.
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By the Numbers:
9 days!!!
Days 'til National Rubber Ducky Day: 9
Days 'til the Lafayette Oatmeal Festival in Colorado: 9
Percent chance that George Santos spent most of yesterday in the House cloakroom so people would stop pointing in his direction and laughing: 100%
Number of women besides Patty Murray (D-WA) who have become Senate President pro tempore: 0
Years since Pennsylvania had two elected Democratic senators: 78
Dept. of Justice conviction rate against the Jan. 6 MAGA insurrectionists: 99.8%
Amount the Avatar sequel has made so far: $1.5 billion
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Your Thursday Molly Ivins Moment:
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Puppy Pic of the Day: In Michigan, a "round of appaws" for the Coast Guard…
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CHEERS to fixing up our fixer-uppers. In the most amazing bending of the time-space continuum ever, Joe Biden's Infrastructure Week is nearing the14 month mark. After signing the bill into law in November 2021, he just keeps building and repairing and, to coin a phrase, sciencing the shit out of the stuff America needs to run on. (Contrary to what they claim, it's not "Dunkin'.") Yesterday our modern-day FDR-LBJ hybrid (minus the wars) visited the midwest, where thousands of illegal Kentuckians have been wading across the Ohio River into Cincinnati in search of a better life. But thanks to the infrastructure law, they'll soon be able to just drive across on—[Cue music from The Price Is Right]—A BRAND NEW BRIDGE!!!
Biden was joined by Mitch McConnell, who caused a brief delay when he instinctively stood up and tried to filibuster the ceremony, which continued without incident after two cloture votes and one mega-injection of ketamine.
CHEERS to Republicans in array. It was inspiring, really. And, yes, I realize that I'm saying that as a card-carrying Demonrat, but I thought it demonstrated the best of our democracy that the GOP came together, put their differences aside, compromised, and chose a Speaker of the House yesterday who embodies the values of the entire spectrum of the modern conservative movement. His name is Burt:
He graduated from Harvard, is a Pisces, and likes long midnight strolls on the kitchen floor. He will take no questions at this time.
P.S. Sadly, Burt was intentionally stepped on this morning by Lauren Boebert. Thoughts and prayers. The saga continues.
CHEERS to Democratic bulldogs. Speaking of speakers, former Speaker of the House Tip O'Neill—who coined the phrase "All politics is local"—died 29 years ago today at 81. His 1994 New York Times obituary is an excellent read on retail politics and how Team D can differentiate itself from Team R:
Pay your respects here. Bulbously.
CHEERS to the Land of Enchantment. Happy 111th birthday this week to our 47th state: New Mexico! Not many people know this, but the state's official insect is the tarantula hawk wasp, which apparently flew through the gates of hell to get here:
Also: not many people know that the state maintains an army of giant tarantula hawk wasps in an underground bunker in Roswell. And also not many people know that therein lies the reason for the state's official motto: "What New Mexico Wants, New Mexico Gets."
CHEERS to today's edition of Yup, That'll Do It. Courtesy of Russia, who for once is probably saying something true:
This has been today's edition of Yup, That'll Do It.
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Ten years ago in C&J: January 5, 2013
CHEERS and JEERS to the Mustache of Independence. Three days after being sworn in as Maine's new Senator, Angus King classed up the roundtable on Meet the Press yesterday. Much of what he said made sense, like this:
And he occasionally made me urp my breakfast into my lap:
I'll give him the benefit of the doubt and assume he means ideologically. But I'm still sending him the bill to get my jammies dry-cleaned.
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And just one more…
CHEERS and JEERS to the speech spankers. Right on schedule, Lake Superior State University's annual "banished word list" popped up on the scene to give the cable news anchors a "kicker" story over which to hone their phony-chuckling skills. Sure, we're happy to see terms like "GOAT," "absolutely" and especially "It is what it is" on the list. But C&J—thin-skinned as we are—will never shake the bitterness that infused our lives on that dark day in 2005 when they went off the linguistic deep end:
So, for the eighteenth year in a row (and until they apologize for being such meanies), C&J humbly keeps these four words on our own banished list: Lake Superior State University.
Have a nice Thursday. Floor's open...What are you cheering and jeering about today?
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A portrait in contrast to the ideology Republicans tried to force on our country two years ago tomorrow: it was on January 6, 1941 when Franklin Roosevelt delivered his famous "Four Freedoms" State of the Union speech. (You can read it and hear it here). While the oft-cited quartet—of speech, of religion, from want and from fear—is timeless, so too is this part of his address, which basically is both the Democratic playbook and the American dream. Here's what the dirty effing Hyde Park hippie bleated:
Continued...
• Security for those who need it. • The ending of special privilege for the few. • The preservation of civil liberties for all. • The enjoyment of the fruits of scientific progress in a wider and constantly rising standard of living.
January 6, 1941
These are the simple, the basic things that must never be lost sight of in the turmoil and unbelievable complexity of our modern world. The inner and abiding strength of our economic and political systems is dependent upon the degree to which they fulfill these expectations.
Many subjects connected with our social economy call for immediate improvement. As examples: We should bring more citizens under the coverage of old-age pensions and unemployment insurance. We should widen the opportunities for adequate medical care. We should plan a better system by which persons deserving or needing gainful employment may obtain it."
He was right—simple and basic things based on decency, compassion and common sense to ensure domestic tranquility and promote the public good. What a perfect contrast to the “ideals” of anarchy and dictatorship that’ll be celebrated tomorrow by Republicans on their new high holy day. I’ll take FDR’s vision, thanks. I just never quite got the hang of knuckle dragging.
And now, our feature presentation…
-
Cheers and Jeers for Thursday, January 5, 2023
Note: Today is National Bird Day. Please flip it responsibly.
-
By the Numbers:
9 days!!!
Days 'til National Rubber Ducky Day: 9
Days 'til the Lafayette Oatmeal Festival in Colorado: 9
Percent chance that George Santos spent most of yesterday in the House cloakroom so people would stop pointing in his direction and laughing: 100%
Number of women besides Patty Murray (D-WA) who have become Senate President pro tempore: 0
Years since Pennsylvania had two elected Democratic senators: 78
Dept. of Justice conviction rate against the Jan. 6 MAGA insurrectionists: 99.8%
Amount the Avatar sequel has made so far: $1.5 billion
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Your Thursday Molly Ivins Moment:
Oh boy! Starting the year off briskly, lending it such tone already, such cachet, such je ne sais quoi—those Republicans are so special, aren't they? Their first move, first rat out of the trap, top priority: lower ethics standards. Yessiree, this 2005 is going to be quite a year.
Let's put that to a vote. Many problems before us—Iraq, a Social Security "crisis," a real health care crisis, world terrorism, our international reputation possibly at its lowest ever ... who is in favor of lowering ethics standards first? Who thinks ethics standards in Washington are too high? […]
Now, I'm not going to conclude that Fascism Is Upon Us just because we have an administration that not only can't find the Constitution but apparently doesn't know there is one. Too early in the year for that. Long way to go. Got to save your indignation. But it is unpleasantly reminiscent of Watergate, isn't it? That's what we're looking at here, folks—not just constitutional deafness, but moral turp as well. All we need is one bag job and an alert night security man.
—January 2005
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Puppy Pic of the Day: In Michigan, a "round of appaws" for the Coast Guard…
-
CHEERS to fixing up our fixer-uppers. In the most amazing bending of the time-space continuum ever, Joe Biden's Infrastructure Week is nearing the14 month mark. After signing the bill into law in November 2021, he just keeps building and repairing and, to coin a phrase, sciencing the shit out of the stuff America needs to run on. (Contrary to what they claim, it's not "Dunkin'.") Yesterday our modern-day FDR-LBJ hybrid (minus the wars) visited the midwest, where thousands of illegal Kentuckians have been wading across the Ohio River into Cincinnati in search of a better life. But thanks to the infrastructure law, they'll soon be able to just drive across on—[Cue music from The Price Is Right]—A BRAND NEW BRIDGE!!!
President Joe Biden came to Greater Cincinnati Wednesday to tout a long-awaited Brent Spence Bridge project that he said proves Americans can still get things done if they work together.
Biden bridges the divide.
Speaking in Covington, not far from the 60-year-old bridge that had for years been a symbol of partisan gridlock, Biden praised Republicans and Democrats in Ohio, Kentucky and Washington for setting aside their differences to fix one of the nation’s most important pieces of infrastructure.
"I believe it sends a message, an important message, to the entire country," Biden said of the new law that made the bridge project possible. "We can work together. We can get things done. We can move the nation forward."
Biden was joined by Mitch McConnell, who caused a brief delay when he instinctively stood up and tried to filibuster the ceremony, which continued without incident after two cloture votes and one mega-injection of ketamine.
CHEERS to Republicans in array. It was inspiring, really. And, yes, I realize that I'm saying that as a card-carrying Demonrat, but I thought it demonstrated the best of our democracy that the GOP came together, put their differences aside, compromised, and chose a Speaker of the House yesterday who embodies the values of the entire spectrum of the modern conservative movement. His name is Burt:
He graduated from Harvard, is a Pisces, and likes long midnight strolls on the kitchen floor. He will take no questions at this time.
P.S. Sadly, Burt was intentionally stepped on this morning by Lauren Boebert. Thoughts and prayers. The saga continues.
CHEERS to Democratic bulldogs. Speaking of speakers, former Speaker of the House Tip O'Neill—who coined the phrase "All politics is local"—died 29 years ago today at 81. His 1994 New York Times obituary is an excellent read on retail politics and how Team D can differentiate itself from Team R:
He was a large, joyous, generous-spirited man with a bulbous nose, yellowed white hair that flopped over his forehead and an ever-present cigar. […]
You never saw him and Lt. Frank Drebin in the same room together.
Mr. O'Neill was an old-style politician and proud of it, a House Speaker comfortable with power, who clung to his brand of liberalism long after it ceased to be fashionable, even among his fellow Democrats.
An early opponent of the Vietnam War, Mr. O'Neill took strong positions on many controversial issues. He was the Congressional leader who pushed hardest for the impeachment of President Richard M. Nixon and later, as Speaker, put his prestige on the line for Congressional reform. […] To Mr. O'Neill, who spoke of the Democratic Party with near-religious fervor, the party was the one of the cities, the working people, the poor, the needy, the unemployed, the sick and the disinherited. "And no way are we ever going to let them down," he would insist.
Pay your respects here. Bulbously.
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CHEERS to the Land of Enchantment. Happy 111th birthday this week to our 47th state: New Mexico! Not many people know this, but the state's official insect is the tarantula hawk wasp, which apparently flew through the gates of hell to get here:
When a female is ready to lay her eggs, she seeks out a tarantula and injects it with paralyzing venom.
Welcome to New Mexico!
She drags the tarantula to a burrow and stuffs it down the hole, then lays her eggs on top of the paralyzed spider. Several days later the eggs hatch and the larvae feed on the still living tarantula.
Also: not many people know that the state maintains an army of giant tarantula hawk wasps in an underground bunker in Roswell. And also not many people know that therein lies the reason for the state's official motto: "What New Mexico Wants, New Mexico Gets."
CHEERS to today's edition of Yup, That'll Do It. Courtesy of Russia, who for once is probably saying something true:
This has been today's edition of Yup, That'll Do It.
-
Ten years ago in C&J: January 5, 2013
CHEERS and JEERS to the Mustache of Independence. Three days after being sworn in as Maine's new Senator, Angus King classed up the roundtable on Meet the Press yesterday. Much of what he said made sense, like this:
And he occasionally made me urp my breakfast into my lap:
I'll give him the benefit of the doubt and assume he means ideologically. But I'm still sending him the bill to get my jammies dry-cleaned.
-
And just one more…
CHEERS and JEERS to the speech spankers. Right on schedule, Lake Superior State University's annual "banished word list" popped up on the scene to give the cable news anchors a "kicker" story over which to hone their phony-chuckling skills. Sure, we're happy to see terms like "GOAT," "absolutely" and especially "It is what it is" on the list. But C&J—thin-skinned as we are—will never shake the bitterness that infused our lives on that dark day in 2005 when they went off the linguistic deep end:
BLOG – and its variations, including blogger, blogged, blogging, blogosphere. Many who nominated it were unsure of the meaning. Sounds like something your mother would slap you for saying.
Killing frogs for over 20 years?
"Sounds like a Viking’s drink that’s better than grog, or a technique to kill a frog." Teri Vaughn, Anaheim, Calif.
"Maybe it’s something that would be stuck in my toilet." – Adrian Whittaker, Dundalk, Ontario.
"I think the words ‘journal’ and ‘diary’ need to come back." – T. J. Allen, Shreveport, La.
So, for the eighteenth year in a row (and until they apologize for being such meanies), C&J humbly keeps these four words on our own banished list: Lake Superior State University.
Have a nice Thursday. Floor's open...What are you cheering and jeering about today?
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