Ah Christmas, a lovely time for romantic adventures, from walks admiring twinkling lights to cosy nights in small pubs.
In fact, recent research by Lovehoney revealed that over three-quarters of Brits want to be coupled up this Christmas - cuffing season anyone?
But for those who are single or those who are feeling like their relationship doesn’t emulate the love they see around them, the lovey-dovey festive season can all seem a bit spew-worthy.
It can even leave us feeling jealous - something that is only heightened when heading home for Christmas and immediately seeing other family members or friends with their respective other halves.
So what is the best way to navigate these feelings of envy? To answer this, Lovehoney has partnered with relationship expert Callisto Adams to reveal exactly what relationship envy is, why it’s so rife at this time of year and tips on how to cope with it.
What is relationship envy?
Put simply, Adams says that relationship envy is the feeling you get when you find yourself being jealous of another couple’s relationship - or wanting to have that type of relationship when you’re single.
It’s even more prevalent at Christmas when we’re tuning into love-based festive movies (The Holiday, Love Actually etc) and constantly bombarded with photos of friends cosying up with their loved ones on social media.
Adams adds: “We are currently in cuffing season, a time of year when advertisements about happiness and joy within couples and families are endless, and a time when it’s cold to the point where it leaves us craving emotional warmth.
“During the festive period, there is often more pressure surrounding your relationship status. This can lead to feeling a need to have what others around you are having, to have warmth, emotional support, and a person to share the festivities with.”
What are the signs that may mean someone is experiencing relationship envy?
If the above is all starting to feel a little too close to home, you could be experiencing a big ol’ whack of relationship envy.
According to Adams there are three key signs which may indicate that you are succumbing to the green-eyed monster:
You find yourself comparing your relationship to others, or you find yourself looking at couples wishing to have what they have.
You imagine your partner behaving in a specific manner (like the one you’ve seen in another couple).
You get sad when you see happy couples.
How to navigate relationship envy
Okay FINE, we accept it, maybe we do get a little jealous of other relationships at this time of year (and maybe cheering for Alan Rickman’s character in Love Actually was a major sign of it).
So what do we do about it? Here’s what Adams advises:
Take time to appreciate what you have. Try to see beauty in your relationships - be that romantic, with friends, or with your family.
Try to understand that what you’re feeling is likely to be imposed by external factors, whether that be environmental or cultural.
Take time to understand why you’re feeling this way. Is there something truly missing from your relationship which is making you envious, or maybe you are stuck in a negative cycle of comparing your relationship to others?
If you are still experiencing and struggling with relationship envy, don’t be afraid to talk to your partner or even a therapist about your feelings.
