The Qronicles is a series that will collect some of the news, videos, and general mis/disinformation roiling around the conspiracy world of QAnon. You can cringe, you can laugh, but these folks are organizing and showing up at the polls!
Update: The original story had some fake numerological news in it. I was got. So I replaced it with a real QAnon numerology.
Since the last time we covered the world of QAnon, not a lot has changed. I mean, everything changes moment by moment in the world of far-fetched conspiracy theories, goalposts move, Rep. Madison Cawthorn tells some random dude on a podcast called Warrior Poet Society that GOP operatives in Washington, D.C., are doing blow and having orgies—literally. So, this Qweeq (boom), the word on the street is “orgyalphamalelegalisticjewishbankingconspiracyadocious”!
Come along and find out what that means! [Spooky intriguing music plays]
Let’s go over and see what InfoWars’ Alex Jones is up to. He’s sort of the original Q-conduit—before there was a “Q.”
How about that for hyperbole? I’m not sure what’s more far-fetched: The idea that Hillary Clinton, Barack Obama, and George Soros are secretly hiding bio-weapons labs in Ukraine because they plan on beginning the New World Order with Dr. Anthony Fauci’s help, or that anyone could believe, and say with a straight face, that Donald Trump Jr. is “one of the best” orators, on par with Martin Luther King Jr.
Remember that orgy and cocaine thing Rep. Madison Cawthorn said?
Yup. He said it. It’s right there. Ever heard of numerology? How about super-duper grade school-style numerology?
Fear Theater! I was faked out once already by some simple, and more believable (frankly) numerology. But my version of numerology remains the same—and equally factual!
Open your eyes!
It is compelling! Meanwhile, some good news! QAnon isn’t anti-China anymore! In fact, all of that Trumpaganda against China was 12-dimensional chess or maybe just 10-dimensional Jesus strategy.
I know this is all galactic mind stuff that can be hard to wrap your tiny little liberal brains around, so, let’s get local! Here’s Mr. Ryan Parkes, who wants “alpha males” to “teach people in the neighborhood how to be alpha males.”
The six-year-old in me wants a lightsaber too! Hell, the 47-year-old in me wants a lightsaber! What’s happening in the world of Fox Nation? Lara Logan! Remember her? She’s been promoting some far-out, bad-science, anti-vaxxer, “HIV and AIDS aren’t real” Q-aganda. Maybe it is something in her upbringing or maybe she came to it later, but Logan is here to remind you that you can talk conspiracy theories until you are blue in the face but it all comes back to the Jews! Specifically, the scariest Jews in all Christendom—the Rothschilds!
Did you get that? The Jews that run the world went “back to the Big Bang” and hired a scientist to come up with a theory of evolution—a theory that may not be true! And even if Darwinian evolution accurately describes reality, it is likely only true in order to control the world. Why are your eyes glazing over? I get it. It’s been a tough Qweeq! (Yay!)
Update: The original story had some fake numerological news in it. I was got. So I replaced it with a real QAnon numerology.
Since the last time we covered the world of QAnon, not a lot has changed. I mean, everything changes moment by moment in the world of far-fetched conspiracy theories, goalposts move, Rep. Madison Cawthorn tells some random dude on a podcast called Warrior Poet Society that GOP operatives in Washington, D.C., are doing blow and having orgies—literally. So, this Qweeq (boom), the word on the street is “orgyalphamalelegalisticjewishbankingconspiracyadocious”!
Come along and find out what that means! [Spooky intriguing music plays]
Let’s go over and see what InfoWars’ Alex Jones is up to. He’s sort of the original Q-conduit—before there was a “Q.”
How about that for hyperbole? I’m not sure what’s more far-fetched: The idea that Hillary Clinton, Barack Obama, and George Soros are secretly hiding bio-weapons labs in Ukraine because they plan on beginning the New World Order with Dr. Anthony Fauci’s help, or that anyone could believe, and say with a straight face, that Donald Trump Jr. is “one of the best” orators, on par with Martin Luther King Jr.
Remember that orgy and cocaine thing Rep. Madison Cawthorn said?
Yup. He said it. It’s right there. Ever heard of numerology? How about super-duper grade school-style numerology?
Fear Theater! I was faked out once already by some simple, and more believable (frankly) numerology. But my version of numerology remains the same—and equally factual!
Reagan 6
Bush 4
Bush 4
Trump 5
COVID = 19
Bush 4
Bush 4
Trump 5
COVID = 19
Open your eyes!
Donald 6
John 4
Trump 5
Years in Office 4
COVID = 19
John 4
Trump 5
Years in Office 4
COVID = 19
It is compelling! Meanwhile, some good news! QAnon isn’t anti-China anymore! In fact, all of that Trumpaganda against China was 12-dimensional chess or maybe just 10-dimensional Jesus strategy.
I know this is all galactic mind stuff that can be hard to wrap your tiny little liberal brains around, so, let’s get local! Here’s Mr. Ryan Parkes, who wants “alpha males” to “teach people in the neighborhood how to be alpha males.”
The six-year-old in me wants a lightsaber too! Hell, the 47-year-old in me wants a lightsaber! What’s happening in the world of Fox Nation? Lara Logan! Remember her? She’s been promoting some far-out, bad-science, anti-vaxxer, “HIV and AIDS aren’t real” Q-aganda. Maybe it is something in her upbringing or maybe she came to it later, but Logan is here to remind you that you can talk conspiracy theories until you are blue in the face but it all comes back to the Jews! Specifically, the scariest Jews in all Christendom—the Rothschilds!
Did you get that? The Jews that run the world went “back to the Big Bang” and hired a scientist to come up with a theory of evolution—a theory that may not be true! And even if Darwinian evolution accurately describes reality, it is likely only true in order to control the world. Why are your eyes glazing over? I get it. It’s been a tough Qweeq! (Yay!)