Virginia Foxx is a U.S. representative from North Carolina and not, as you might suspect from her name, a now-bitter original member of Emmet Otter’s Jug Band.
Honestly, I’d never heard of her before. Yes, I’m a politics nerd, but apparently she’s been hiding her light under a bushel basket all this time. Or maybe Matt Gaetz’s head was in the way. Who knows, really? Come out from behind Matt’s shadow, Ginny, and claim your place among the parthenon of perfidious putzes polluting the ‘Publican Party.
Folks, I give you a play in four acts, starring Rep. Foxx. We pick up our story a week after the Capitol riot, a watershed historical event that happened earlier this year but which Republicans are trying to mash down the memory hole. Kind of like Don Jr. flushing burlap sacks full of cocaine after the room service he forgot he ordered finally shows up at the door. (Note: I don’t know that Junior’s actually done this. I don’t even know if he does cocaine. But people are saying. Many, many people.)
Behold!
Let’s unpack that for the non-tweeters, shall we? Our story begins on the morning of Jan. 13, with an observation from The Daily Beast’s Matt Fuller.
This was exactly one week after the Capitol riot, when tensions were presumably at their highest and, for some reason, members of Congress—who were still recovering emotionally from being nearly murdered seven days earlier—were a bit on edge.
Foxx responded within hours: It was FAKE NEWS!
Pop quiz. If a reporter says something and then a Republican says something that directly contradicts the original statement, you should:
a) Believe the reporter
b) Believe the Republican
c) Does there have to be a fucking c)?
d) Seriously, how did you even get past a)? Why are you still taking this quiz?
About 20 minutes later, Fuller defended his reporting in the strongest terms.
And that’s where these two left their online spat. Until yesterday, that is:
Of course, the Fascistic Ms. Foxx, who voted against both Trump impeachments, was being fined for a new violation, which occurred just a few days ago. But if she’s a scofflaw now, it stands to reason that the reporter who previously called her out was maybe, possibly telling the truth.
From USA Today:
“A good thing,” huh? I imagine that’s just what the rioters Donald Trump sent to murder his vice president said, too.
If Foxx wants the metal detectors to go away and decorum to return, maybe she should have helped excise the Tang-hued tumor that continues to metastasize out of control on our nation’s still-pulsating sphincter (i.e., “Florida”).
But that would have required far more courage than it takes to blow through a metal detector at the Capitol, huh?
It made comedian Sarah Silverman say “THIS IS FUCKING BRILLIANT” and prompted author Stephen King to shout “Pulitzer Prize!!!” (on Twitter, that is). What is it? The viral letter that launched four hilarious Trump-trolling books. Get them all, including the finale, Goodbye, Asshat: 101 Farewell Letters to Donald Trump, at this link. Just $12.96 for the pack of 4! Or if you prefer a test drive, you can download the epilogue to Goodbye, Asshat for the low, low price of FREE.
Honestly, I’d never heard of her before. Yes, I’m a politics nerd, but apparently she’s been hiding her light under a bushel basket all this time. Or maybe Matt Gaetz’s head was in the way. Who knows, really? Come out from behind Matt’s shadow, Ginny, and claim your place among the parthenon of perfidious putzes polluting the ‘Publican Party.
Folks, I give you a play in four acts, starring Rep. Foxx. We pick up our story a week after the Capitol riot, a watershed historical event that happened earlier this year but which Republicans are trying to mash down the memory hole. Kind of like Don Jr. flushing burlap sacks full of cocaine after the room service he forgot he ordered finally shows up at the door. (Note: I don’t know that Junior’s actually done this. I don’t even know if he does cocaine. But people are saying. Many, many people.)
Behold!
Just gonna leave this whole thing here. pic.twitter.com/95WXBDySXw
— Matt Fuller (@MEPFuller) May 18, 2021
Let’s unpack that for the non-tweeters, shall we? Our story begins on the morning of Jan. 13, with an observation from The Daily Beast’s Matt Fuller.
This was exactly one week after the Capitol riot, when tensions were presumably at their highest and, for some reason, members of Congress—who were still recovering emotionally from being nearly murdered seven days earlier—were a bit on edge.
Foxx responded within hours: It was FAKE NEWS!
Pop quiz. If a reporter says something and then a Republican says something that directly contradicts the original statement, you should:
a) Believe the reporter
b) Believe the Republican
c) Does there have to be a fucking c)?
d) Seriously, how did you even get past a)? Why are you still taking this quiz?
About 20 minutes later, Fuller defended his reporting in the strongest terms.
And that’s where these two left their online spat. Until yesterday, that is:
Of course, the Fascistic Ms. Foxx, who voted against both Trump impeachments, was being fined for a new violation, which occurred just a few days ago. But if she’s a scofflaw now, it stands to reason that the reporter who previously called her out was maybe, possibly telling the truth.
From USA Today:
Rep. Virginia Foxx, R-N.C., is facing a $5,000 fine for failing to comply with a security screening before entering the House Chamber, a post-Jan. 6 security measure that other Republicans have also on occasion not followed.
On May 13, the congresswoman "ran through the magnetometer, triggering the alarm," and "threw her bag underneath the table" next to the screening device, according to a memorandum of the incident filed by U.S. Capitol Police. Foxx said she was late for a vote, according to a witness statement.
Foxx bypassed a USCP officer who attempted to stop her but returned to the screening area to complete screening procedures after casting her vote. An officer testified she said, "Good thing no one stopped me..." The incident was witnessed by an unknown reporter, according to the memorandum.
“A good thing,” huh? I imagine that’s just what the rioters Donald Trump sent to murder his vice president said, too.
If Foxx wants the metal detectors to go away and decorum to return, maybe she should have helped excise the Tang-hued tumor that continues to metastasize out of control on our nation’s still-pulsating sphincter (i.e., “Florida”).
But that would have required far more courage than it takes to blow through a metal detector at the Capitol, huh?
It made comedian Sarah Silverman say “THIS IS FUCKING BRILLIANT” and prompted author Stephen King to shout “Pulitzer Prize!!!” (on Twitter, that is). What is it? The viral letter that launched four hilarious Trump-trolling books. Get them all, including the finale, Goodbye, Asshat: 101 Farewell Letters to Donald Trump, at this link. Just $12.96 for the pack of 4! Or if you prefer a test drive, you can download the epilogue to Goodbye, Asshat for the low, low price of FREE.